women are impossible to please…


Dear Friends: Hope you are all doing fine. I have been sending you Thoughts for some years. Hope you enjoy reading them. In case you don’t find them useful or have no time to read them, please feel free to write to me and I will stop sending you from now on. 

Thanks and Have a Nice Day! Elsy Mathew


Women are impossible to please…………………..

A good tree always produces good fruit, a rotten tree produces bad fruit. 
A good tree cannot produce bad fruit and a rotten tree cannot bear good fruit. 
Any tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown in the fire. 
So you will know them by their fruit.” (The Bible, Mathew 7:15-20).
A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband.  Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE !

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch . . .. you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband . .

SHE SIGNS THE PAPERS AT THE GROUND FLOOR RECEPTION AND PROCEEDS UPSTAIRS!!

At the first floor entrance the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 – These men have jobs and love the Lord.

The second floor sign reads:
Floor 2 – These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love  kids.

The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 – These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

“Wow,” she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:
Floor 4 – These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead good looking and help with the housework.

“Oh, mercy me!” she exclaims, “I can hardly stand it!”

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:
Floor 5 – These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead gorgeous, help with the  housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6 – You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!


A woman went to police station to file a report for her missing husband:

Woman: I lost my husband
Inspector: What is his height
Woman: I never noticed
Inspector: Slim or healthy
Woman: Not slim can be healthy
Inspector: Color of eyes
Woman: Never noticed
Inspector: Color of hair
Woman: Should be black
Inspector: What was he wearing
Woman: I don’t remember exactly
Inspector: Was somebody with him ?????????
Woman: Yes my Labrador dog (Romeo), tied with a golden chain, height 30 inches, healthy, blue eyes, blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken, he never barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls, he likes non veg food, we eat together, we jog together.

The woman started crying
Inspector: Let’s search for the dog first!!!!!!! !!!!!!

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